Stop worrying so much! Why do you question everything? Everything is going to be alright.
A couple of weeks ago a friend of mine shared a thought with me that pretty much coincides with an observation that I have made especially often now that I have a male somebody to share my thoughts with 24/7: while men can’t be bothered most of the time, women just can’t stop worrying about everything. Everything. Am I going to succeed? What if I’m not smart enough? Am I pretty enough? Does he really love me? Is this going to last forever? What did he mean with ‘ok’? Is it me or does my tushy look huge in these jeans? Now is this a good or a bad thing? What am I going to eat for lunch? Am I ever going to get rid of that extra piece of cake? I don’t know about you but that’s what I got from my mama.
My friend told me to write a post about it so I started thinking – great concept. Thinking of the situations where I worry about something and comparing it to the rare situations I can recollect of my boyfriend or other men worrying brought me to another conclusion: men do worry – they just don’t worry about the same type of things as women do.
Besides worrying about love and their weight 24/7, women worry a lot about their loved ones and how everything will work out for them. Women can’t just let their men leave the house without worrying about their well-being. Maybe you should put on a jacket, it will be cold in the evening. Promise you won’t drive too fast. Are you sure you won’t be hungry? Men are like puppies, too jaunty to care for their health, they need to be chaperoned.
Neither can women just let their friend’s lives unattended. What did he say? Are you happy? Please don’t whatsapp while you drive. A good friend is somebody who questions everything before you can say it out loud, a good friend will think of things that you might have forgotten, a good friend is your conscience and your confidence when you can’t hear anything over the sound of life.
To women, happiness is a fleeting construct. They can never just be content with what they have – How long will it last? Is it really what we think it is? What if something happens to it? I believe that this is where jealousy comes from with women – panic of losing what makes us happy. In contrast I think what men think of when feeling jealousy is Who is better than me? Why is he better than me? I don’t like this. Maybe that is also the reason why they seem to be more indifferent to hurting other people – they can’t emphasize as much as women do. They can’t think of you when they are too busy with something else.
See what I’m aiming at? Men do worry, but do you know what they worry about? Themselves. And that is nothing they want to share with the world. Am I successful enough? Do I look bulky enough? Do people respect me? Did I satisfy her? Is my manhood big enough? Why talk about worries when you can talk about success, why communicate weakness and sorrows when you need to be the toughest? These are the things you only learn when things get uneasy, when life takes an unexpected turn, when they feel like they are broken or on rare occasions when even men enjoy the relieving sensation of sharing.
Maybe you don’t like this. Maybe this is too black or white for you. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe this is just a brief thought. Maybe women should cut a slice off of men. But maybe we’re on the right track.
Questioning things can be good for you, sometimes.