Monthly Archives: March 2016


IT’S SO QUIET HERE!!! I know, that’s because we’re still at feud with my annoying neighbors – annoying or just plain disgusting, whatevz – and busy with more equally exciting stuff. Just to give you a quick update on the neighbor part: yep, I’ve turned into one of those people who call the police when life get’s annoying and honestly, I think I could get used to this so think before you annoy me.

Anyway, this whole story made me realize how I haven’t talked about my strong aversion to groupings of all sorts yet – because of course my neighbor and his mattress are members of our university’s foreigners’ club, which doesn’t surprise me at all, now that I think of it. I’m not against foreigners, I’m a Russian with a German passport, living in Switzerland myself so I guess I would have qualified for joining a couple of clubs at university… BUT:

I’ve never understood why someone would like to join a club / society / association / or whatever kind of grouping that doesn’t have some ‘real’ purpose like a competitive sports team or whatever. I mean, I get it, same interests, you feel like sharing it with someone, blablabla, whatever – I’m not judging as long as it doesn’t affect me. But honestly, so many of these groupings only live on the desire of belonging to some sort of group, any group really, besides providing an acceptable excuse for regular piss-ups. I’m sure that what counts for many of the groups that we have at uni, applies to others just as well. And isn’t that sad? I don’t need to belong to an official group in order to meet up with like-minded people and get drunk.

My favorite example are fraternities. I don’t know what reputation they have outside of Switzerland and Germany, but I’ve never ever met a decent member of a fraternity – and I’ve had the chance to meet numerous of these individuals, unfortunately. Such a primitive, narrow-minded custom, maintained by a bunch of losers here and there who have nothing but their network to identify with. Always proud, always complacent – for no reason at all, really.

No, really. It’s so tiresome to try to have an enjoyable interaction with an individual that clearly has no interest at all in stretching its horizon any further than that particular group’s status quo – and sometimes I think these people don’t even notice what is happening to them. Doesn’t that sound familiar to you?

Last autumn, when I had just gotten back to university to do my master’s degree, a girl who I knew back from my bachelor’s asked me if I was planning to apply for CEMS, which, I guess, is an ok question for some distant small talk. But when my answer was nah, she replied with why? like it was weird to not even consider an additional, overrated program. I find it hard to not explode in such situations. Don’t get me wrong: if you think that whatever decision is good for you, then I’m not going to comment against it – but why can’t you do the same thing in return?

These are the same people who always use hashtags for their group, who always have to point out who they are with and how people belonging to this group are the best and particularly good people for whatever reason. ‘You know you’re member of that and that group if you’re this and that’ ‘Only members of that and that group will know that…’ etc. Don’t tell me you have never found yourself rolling your eyes over a post by some distant FB friend or a conversation for the reason I’m trying to describe here. Ugh, right?

In psychology, there’s this thing called groupthink, which describes the need for harmony and conformity within a group of individuals, which results in an irrational or dysfunctional outcome when it comes do decisions and behavior. No critical evaluation, no alternative views and isolation from outside influences. Just complete identification and latching onto some collective. I know that this might stretch a little far, but I think that we’re all witnessing this much more often than we’re aware of.

Before you get all ‘You’re just bitter you don’t belong to some super great club’ – I’m neither bitter, nor am I completely against people getting together with other people for whatever reason and also it’s not like I would be rejected by too many groups if I tried to be a part of it, obviously. I guess what I’m trying to say is: if you’re going to be annoying, be so because of your own personality, not because of affiliation. Be your own kind of obnoxious, not a shared one. And if you belong to some kind of group, stay individual, above all when you’re dealing with other people. Do yourself and others that favor.

Having an own personality is good for you, trust me.




P.s.: In case of offense, please turn to my disclaimer – in case of enjoyment, please turn to my Facebook page xoxo

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At war

Damn, people – I know I’m not too active on here at the moment, trying to be a good student but you’d be surprised to know how busy I am in real life – and that, so the haters say, is what matters. I don’t know if you remember or not but I told you a little something about my rather loud neighbors some while ago. And if you don’t, you probably should read the story here first.

I’m pretty sure it’s a hooker.

Well… never would I have thought that this could be possible, but it has gotten even worse since. Unbearable, in fact – or how would you describe not only not being able to fall asleep at about 11pm because you have to wait until missy down there finally stops the screaming but then also waking up again at about 1am because – are you kidding me?? – that tr*mp is back at it again, louder than ever. Wow.

Saw this on a neighbors door coming home at midnight

Now, I’d like to say that I’m neither sensitive when it comes to noise (I have lived above two bars in the old town of Zurich and never ever did I wake up from the loud music or drunk people screaming up and down the alleys) nor am I uptight or frigid or whatever. I’m all for do whatever the F you want with whoever you feel like doing it with – as long as it doesn’t negatively interfere with my life, or sleep, in this case. Also, I’m not the only neighbor who’s slowly losing her mind over this.

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I’m usually a rather shy person and the whole topic was awkward at the beginning – for me, when really it should have been for them – but I’m also somebody who can’t hold back with a strongly formed opinion, which is why I tried to talk with them and ask them to please turn the faking down a notch. Why only try? Because that poor guy must have lost his cojones somewhere deep down in that tw*ts vajayjay and thus is too afraid to open the door for me, no matter how often and at what time I try. What a wimp, honestly.

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At least this story is teaching me a number of valuable lessons, which I’ve decided to share with you:

You know how it’s really hard to tell what you’re looking for in a guy or a person specifically, but not as hard to know what you’re NOT looking for? Well, if you ever get with a guy that is afraid of standing up for things he does (like opening a door to a girl who just wants to ask you to be a little more quiet – boohoo), then run. He’s less of a man than you are, don’t waste your time on him. Honestly, the guy didn’t even open the door when I questioned his manhood loud enough for him to hear.

Also: never dodge a confrontation. Never. It will only make things worse. Like, I really just wanted to ask if there was a possibility for them to keep the screaming and groaning for daytime and be more quiet during the night but now I’m here, calling the police and administration of the house that we live in, just to make sure I get the opportunity of telling it to his face.

Next thing, this one is for the guys: If your girl knows that her screaming is making a whole building gag and still goes on faking the sh*t out of your weak performance – congrats! You’ve not landed an extraordinarily dirty girl – you’ve found queen B. Super classy.

Anyway, so much for now – I’ll keep you updated on my war zone here. Happy to hear about your thoughts on this – think I should embrace the nausea?

And guys, if you’re reading this: you really don’t sound as sexy as you think you do. I have recordings of your late night show that I have sent to various friends to check if I was overreacting – and I wasn’t the only one who lost her appetite. Have merci.

Don’t waste your time on a wimp, trust me.



P.s.: Here’s my disclaimer for everybody who thinks that I’m a mean one and here’s the Facebook page for everybody who doesn’t.

Pictures taken from – duh

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I’ve noticed that a new hysteria has arisen in the last couple of days or weeks or months: fake #fitspo or transformation pictures. More or less famous Instagramers and other people on social media are showing others how easy it is to look way better in pictures on Instagram than in real life. Breaking news.

Now answer me this: Are people really that naive? To not know that a lot of the things that you see on the web are very different in reality? I’ve seen people from all ages, not kids, expressing their utter surprise about the fact that Instagram and much of the so called fitspo is full of shit… Hell, I’ve been nervous about meeting people that have only seen me on the internet for as much as I can think – I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t recognize me without my selfie face on.

Don’t even get me started about my body – of course I’ll choose to upload a picture of my legs looking the length of that of a normal person and not the photo where I’m like two thirds upper body, barely one third legs. My fav pictures are those where you don’t see my legs at all. For a reason. And of course! I’ll only wear crop tops and let you know on days when I feel good about it and prefer to not do it on days when I feel like a little Russian whale because of that time of the month and all sorts of craving. But is that so wrong?

Yes, how you present yourself over the web or any other media has one or the other thing to do with self-confidence, but it has also a lot to do with aesthetics, no? Let’s be honest here – yes, being real is good, but a little illusion here and there makes reality a tiny little bit better. Don’t act like you’re interested in following the ugly truth. Nobody will lie a picture of canned food, either.

I mean, even Kayla – do you think she would post a totally unflattering picture of herself? We all know she’s super skinny and super fit, but I bet even she looks a little bit more like a random girl while lounging on the sofa in her most lose posture. Yes, I know, still fit AF, but you get what I mean. And all the motivation she provides by sharing pictures of herself or others and their progress – is that a bad thing, even if probably most of the time the level of their progress strongly benefits from the right angle?

It’s all about posture and showing or not showing – not lying – and that is ok, if you ask me. As long as you don’t go to such lengths and photoshop your waist and accidentally make the door bend in weird ways as well – go KimK! – I don’t see what’s wrong with it. It’s not exactly news that, whether in real life or in front of a camera, posture can be magic or tragic. And also: it is not exactly somebody else’s fault if you can’t think as far as this, is it?

So, in the spirit of International Women’s Day, why can’t we just be happy for everybody who is feeling good about him- or herself and spreads this message in his or her way – depending on posture or not.

Happy International Women’s Day to all of you! Keep your head, heels and standards high – and go and get yourself some flowers.

Posture is everything, trust me.




P.s.: Disclaimer and Facebook page right here. See ya!



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A guy’s gift guide

Guys, I’m happy to announce that I’ve stepped up my blogger game and have moved closer to really important bloggers that people can’t live without anymore and brands want to work with. It wasn’t easy for me not to tell you about this earlier but the day has finally come: I am doing my first collaboration. One of many more to come, I’m sure, but probably the only one that has something to do with fashion – I’ll probably be more wanted as an ambassador for mean people or a nut connoisseur.

But who is she talking about? Luisaviaroma? Louis V? Will she be Karl’s new muse?

I’m talking about none other than @aguysgiftguide. If you haven’t heard about it yet, you have to check it out ASAP – so simple, such a great idea: it’s an Insagram account / Facebook page / blog – whatever you like best – that aims to inspire men with no taste slash ideas slash commitment at all and help them find the right small attention for their special girl in form of a gift. Great, right? In a perfect scenario this could lead to a world without bad presents: no kitchen equipment, no gift cards or vouchers for massages that that fucker should be treating you to every day anyway. Doesn’t that sound like a brilliant idea?

But how did she land this incredible collaboration, what will she have to do with it?

Well guys, everything you’ve heard about success and landing jobs is right: I’m kind of sleeping with the boss. It’s a little side project that the boy came up with and, for the sake of all you girls out there, has asked me to help him with. Not on the verbal side of it though, he wants it to be a male voice – I’m not responsible for his tonality. I’m basically doing nothing other than before, except for that I’m not sending him links via Skype or tagging him in pic after pic adding I luuuurve, I neeeeeeed, I need moneeeey, hint!!! but am now saving these links in a document for him to post it on his channel, item after item.


a guy's gift guide


Why is she sharing this with us, what does she want from us?

I thought this was an especially good idea for those of you who kind of like my style or taste but have already gotten sick of me posting and posting the same items all over again and also can’t really relate with my sporadic If I was a rich girl postsAs I have said a number of times before: I do not enjoy blogging about items that I have seen on the internet and want to have, I don’t want to talk about trends with you, I want to blog about whatever comes to my mind. But this here could be a good way to still get a bit of both worlds and I will make sure not to suggest exorbitantly pricey items in order to make this more fun for all of us.

My suggestion for now is the following: If you think that this could be something that interests you, go ahead and follow @aguysgiftguide on whatever channel is most convenient for you and if you can think of a great way to casually mention this brilliant idea to your boyfriend, I will make sure to include the stuff that you’ll tell me to add. Deal?

Don’t worry – this is not a couple account. Now go out and share, go out and care!

This gift guide is good for you, trust me.



P.S.: I hope that you can tell the difference between reality and joke and if not, please consult my disclaimer. And while you’re at it, why don’t you go and pay me a visit on Facebook as well?

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